Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Show Day 5

If you want more info about "Show Days" or why I'm doing this, you can find that here.

So today's example is from the book Slammed. (If you like my PG-13 book reviews, I loved this one but I wouldn't read this author beyond this series).

"Kel and I load the last two boxes into the u-haul. I slide the door down and pull the latch shut, lucking up eighteen years of memories, all of which include my dad.

It's been six months since he passed away. Long enough that my nine-year-old brother, Kel, doesn't cry every time we talk about him, but recent enough that we're being forced to accept the financial aftermath that comes to a newly single parented household. A household that can't afford to remain in Texas and in the only home I've ever known."

You get a lot of information in these two paragraphs. You know that the narrator must be a young person, she's moving out of state, away from the only home she's ever known. And you get a sense of the emotional impact the father's death had on the family.

5 comments:

  1. I've been recommending this book a lot but the prose was just so beautifully amazing. Ash by Malinda Lo, now she knows how to show not tell, everything is one beautiful description after the other.

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  2. It's a combo of showing AND telling, which I happen to think is fine.

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  3. I actually think the second paragraph is all telling, but it's done well.

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  4. I have to really watch myself because I tend to "tell" when I know better.

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  5. Hmmm...I think the others have covered my thoughts. I agree.

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